Weeds have rights for family therapy too

Since I started to like gardening, I keep being amazed about every green spear that crops up in any of my flower boxes...

This even happens inside, isn’t that strange? I know that mostly, these are ‘just’ weeds, but still, I can’t help feeling somewhat proud that something green is able to grow on my balcony. I know that these weeds should be removed, but I decided to keep them and make one weeds flower box as an experiment. Who knows, maybe I’ll be lucky and get the most exotic flowers. Or even vegetables. 

Or maybe only dandelions…… Well, dandelions are flowers too, you know. Everybody speaks disparagingly about dandelions, but they might have feelings too. They might not have ears, to hear all the feeble jokes that people make, but they just know! The self-concept of dandelions growing in urban areas has been extremely low over the last decades. One study showed that dandelions in civilized areas grow slightly downwards whereas wild dandelions grow upwards, keeping their heads up high. Well, there might have been some flaws in this study and I don’t have to try too hard to come up with alternative explanations. 

But still, I hereby promise that I’ll be evenly happy with every plant that pops up and will give them just as much care. Or no, I’ll give them as much care as they need. Yes, I’ll act responsive to the needs of every weed. One weed needs more water? I’ll be serving water with a slice of lemon and a leaf of mint, if requested. The other weed needs more plant food? I’ll serve it on a silver plate. A third weed feels depressed? I’ll lay it down on my sofa on a daily basis for the next five years and we’ll have long, psychoanalytic talks about its youth, dreams, and relation with its parents. 

Thinking about it, this might be a bit difficult, since they’ll all be together in the same flower box. I could take the depressed weed (let’s call him Alvin) out of the box during every therapeutic session, but I guess that’s not helpful for the root generation. Maybe the other weeds can put their fingers in their ears so I can put the entire flower box on the sofa. Or if there are any brothers or sisters of Alvin in the flower box, they might as well join therapy. We could have some nice family therapy session where we’ll dig deeply into Alvin’s past. We’ll discuss all painful arguments Alvin had with his brother and sister about for example setting the table, doing the dishes, who had to sit in the middle seat when driving all the way to a French camping site. Who got to decide what programme was being watched on television. About this one time that they locked up Alvin in the shed and wasn’t let out of some hours. Or in the summer of ’91 when they all went on a day trip, but Alvin’s was forgotten. His shoelaces were tied together several times a day. His diary was once taken, copied, and mailed throughout the neighborhood. He always walked to school, because his tires were always punctuated. At school, he was always chosen last with PE. During breaks, he sat underneath a bush, where he had dug a hiding place. He covered himself with leafy branches and wouldn’t get out before everybody got inside already.

Anyway, a flower box full of weeds it is. No bullying allowed. Getting the best care, physically and psychologically. To be continued.....